I've decided to do something a little different today. I usually promote other authors or my latest releases, but while browsing the internet for romantic pictures for my publisher's GLBT day on Facebook, a random thought occurred to me...
I spend far too much time apologizing for the genres I write.
Sometimes I'm apologizing for the M/M stories, but sometimes it's because my books have become hotter over the last couple of years, and I've discovered that other authors, who at one time were my peers, my equals, now seem to look down on me, and that hurts.
Although I may endure the sting, I still can't help asking myself why I feel the need to apologize at all.
After all, I don't write erotic stories for the sex, even though sex is essential for the kind of passion I prefer to express.
I, personally, am a very passionate person and guess what? I can be a little kinky, too. Shocker, I know.
I spent over fifteen years in a marriage where I behaved accordingly as a mother and wife, but in all honesty, passion wasn't always there, though the desire to be passionate definitely was.
In later years, when I had to start over from scratch, I was able to express my inner kink and experiment.
In doing so, I proved what I knew all along... SEX is awesome, and it's even better when desires are freely expressed and one takes advantage of all the beautiful ways to please and be pleased.
Being a little freaky, or more open about sex doesn't mean I don't believe in the sanctity of marriage, the seriousness of a committed relationship, or the equal rights of any couple in love to be together in whatever way they choose or with whomever they choose. It just means that I feel a little freer to express it, and I try to do so tastefully.
Yes, the language tends to be a little rougher with my male/male stories, but in all fairness, men are different than women.
Men can, and do, say things to each other they might not say to a woman simply because most were raised to treat women differently. That's particularly true in my neck of the woods where women are southern belles and men are expected to be gentlemen.
When I write a m/m story, I prefer to let men be men and try not to mold them into the perfect mate for a woman, but instead, the perfect mate for another man. No false pretense or over-politeness for the sake of being gentlemanly. I prefer an alpha to stay alpha and it's even better if both men vie for that coveted spot of "top dog." That's just nature, folks!
When a woman is involved, she can be strong, but the man always needs to be a true hero or he loses favor with the reader and could even lose the interest of the heroine in the process, so there isn't much of a power struggle.
Whereas with two heroes...well, now you're talking a true blue, no holds barred, fight to the finish and that's hot.
So how can I apologize for something that comes naturally to me as a writer? How can I try to 'explain' my position on equal rights for everyone, especially where love is concerned? How can I expect others feel the emotion in my books, if I am untrue to the emotion I create between two lovers?(or 3 where Immortal Thirst is concerned)
And more importantly, how can I apologize for passion, no matter how naughty it gets?
The simple answer is....I won't. Not anymore.
If someone prefers reading behind closed doors sex...so be it. I'll not think less of them or consider them a prude or uptight or in any other negative way.
|by Pablo Picasso|
In return, all I ask is for the same respect to be extended to me, especially from other authors. It's no fun feeling like a outsider just because my taste in writing tends to fall outside the "box".
|by Leonardo Di Vinci|
Our differences are what makes us all so special, whether it be the way we worship, the way we raise our children, or the way we express our desires.
Someone once told me when I first began to seriously pursue writing..."Write like your mama's already dead."
Now, that piece of advice wasn't meant to be a death wish for my mother, by any means.
Instead, it was a reminder to give myself permission to write in a way where I can remain true to my muse and to my heart without fear of what others would say or think.
I'd forgotten that somewhere along the way, but now I'm back on track.